Overcoming Contempt in Your Marriage Relationship

Arnita Fields

March 7, 2017

Overcoming Contempt In Your Marriage Relationship

Arnita Fields


As the ark of the Lord was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window. And when she saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord, she despised him in her heart.” 2 Samuel 6:16

There is a clarion call to guide wives and their spouses back to a place of true unity, particularly those whose bonds have began to unravel over the years. In the noted passage, King David during a time of great celebration at the return of the ark of God, danced in praise and thanksgiving before God. In the midst of what should have been a joyous occasion, his wife Michal daughter of Saul, watched from a window. The passage states she despised him in her heart.

One would ask, how could his wife possibly despise and look down upon her own husband? What led her to believe that she was better than the man who had been chosen by God to be King?

Before you answer, let’s define Despised.

Despised is defined in Merriam Webster as “To look down on with contempt or aversion.”

To take it a step further, Contempt is defined as “Lack of respect or reverence for something.”

Pause for a moment to answer the following questions.

Have you personally experienced this through your spouse or have you ever looked upon your them with any contempt?

What do you believe to be the true source of this behavior?

If you take a few moments to read further into 2 Samuel 6, it will reveal how King David was quite surprised with the behavior of his wife. In fact, he believed Michal not only loved him, but should have been excited with him about what God was doing during this time. Unfortunately, Michal’s contempt for her husband ran deep and did not rise up overnight. Actually it had been incubating in her heart unchallenged for many years. Her father, King Saul prior to her husband was replaced with David by God. For Michal, who believed her family was robbed of this royal seat, became bitter and lost respect for the man who had covered her with his life.

wife husband impotent

In order to not end up broken and bitter as Michal, what can a wife who wants to gain freedom and regain honor and respect for her husband do?  The following are three keys to assist you on this journey.

  1. Ask for the Holy Spirit to look within your heart to reveal what’s beneath the surface.
  2. Acknowledge and repent of any unresolved bitterness towards your spouse.
  3. Activate your faith and rely on God’s strength to restore your respect of your spouse.

BIBLICAL TRUTH

As the ark of the Lord was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window. And when she saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord, she despised him in her heart.” 2 Samuel 6:16

STAY GLAMOROUS

In order for your marriage to flourish, both you and your spouse must be intentional about doing periodic spiritual checkups. Spend some time making sure your hearts are free of any unresolved bitterness. For the times when you notice things navigating towards a chaotic state, remember to first Ask for the Holy Spirit’s guidance. Then Acknowledge any unresolved bitterness. And last, Activate your faith in order to get back on track.

RESOURCES 

Read, “Spiritual Turbulence” by Arnita Fields

GLAMTALK

What is your spouse’s best traits-spiritually, physically, mentally? How often do you compliment your spouse on those traits?

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